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The Good, the Bad & the Difference: How to Tell the Right From Wrong in Everyday Situations
 
 

The Good, the Bad & the Difference: How to Tell the Right From Wrong in Everyday Situations (Paperback)

~ Randy Cohen (Author) "I am an accidental ethicist..." (more)
Key Phrases: individual rectitude, seat hopping, Supreme Court, African American, Atticus Finch (more...)
2.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (16 customer reviews)

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Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

Humbly perched atop his "accidental" vantage point (he never intended to be an ethicist), New York Times Magazine columnist Randy Cohen eagerly analyzes the circuitous moral landscape below and offers smart advice in The Good, the Bad & the Difference. Nearly 200 reader letters, Cohen's thoughtful responses, and occasional counterpoints from guest ethicists make up the bulk of this engaging collection. Divided into seven topics, questions seek guidance on appropriate behavior at work, school, and home; with friends; in public; in the medical field; and in situations where money counts. They range from the clear-cut (seeking justification for acts of revenge), to the no-win situation (think "whistle-blower"). The ethicist in Cohen provides a quick, logically gleaned response; the novelist in him "skillfully limns the complex and subtle relationships and the unspoken obligations that bind people together"; and the humorist in him makes it all irresistible. Each chapter's "Pop Ethics Quiz" invites readers to exercise their own moral muscles on serious and whimsical dilemmas. While Cohen claims no formal background in ethics, perhaps his stint as a writer for Late Night with David Letterman was school enough, for he shows a remarkable ability to smoke out the wrong and carefully preserve the right, even in the kookiest situations. --Liane Thomas --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.


From Publishers Weekly

Cohen, author of the popular New York Times Magazine column "The Ethicist," has collected some of his favorite columns, along with guest commentaries, quizzes for readers and revisions of some of his own advice. Not unlike Miss Manners, Cohen tries to focus on problems that everyday people actually face: e-mail privacy at work, "telling" on a philandering spouse, cheating at school, filching motel soaps, ticket scalping and the like. After outlining the basic ethical issues involved, he offers clear if sometimes painful recommendations for what to do, often leavened with a little Dave Barry-ish humor. Unlike Dear Abby or Judge Judy, Cohen allows for more than one right answer; he includes dissenting opinions from Dan Savage, Katha Pollitt and even his own mom. The concluding section, "I Demand a Recant," rounds up columns that Cohen himself has changed his mind about. Still, rethinking positions hasn't made Cohen a relativist; his basic ethical principles remain clear. "The small civilities of ordinary life" are important. Incompetence should not be confused with unethical behavior. And beware "perilous" associations; working as "Attila the Hun's Gardener" may land you in unintended trouble. Agent, David McCormick. (On sale Mar. Forecast: Cohen's weekly fans will want this for their reference shelves; word of mouth should take it much further. It's the perfect gift for anyone who doesn't read a lot, but feels strongly about "how things ought to be done."
Copyright 2002 Cahners Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

Product Details

  • Paperback: 304 pages
  • Publisher: Broadway (March 25, 2003)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0767908139
  • ISBN-13: 978-0767908139
  • Product Dimensions: 7.9 x 5.2 x 0.7 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 2.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (16 customer reviews)
  • Amazon.com Sales Rank: #206,138 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

    Popular in this category: (What's this?)
    #62 in  Books > Parenting & Families > Parenting > Morals & Responsibility


      More About the Author

      Randy Cohen
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      Front Cover | Table of Contents | First Pages | Surprise Me!

      Inside This Book (learn more)
      First Sentence:
      I am an accidental ethicist. Read the first page
      Key Phrases - Statistically Improbable Phrases (SIPs): (learn more)
      individual rectitude, seat hopping
      Key Phrases - Capitalized Phrases (CAPs): (learn more)
      Supreme Court, African American, Atticus Finch, Bill Gates, Holiday Inn, Ivy League, Late Night, Richard Steele, Jack Warner, Jack Wilkes, James Brown, Social Security, Tom Cruise, White House
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      Customer Reviews

      16 Reviews
      5 star:
       (4)
      4 star:
       (3)
      3 star:   (0)
      2 star:
       (2)
      1 star:
       (7)
       
       
       
       
       
      Average Customer Review
      2.7 out of 5 stars (16 customer reviews)
       
       
       
       
      Share your thoughts with other customers:
      Most Helpful Customer Reviews

       
      25 of 32 people found the following review helpful:
      5.0 out of 5 stars A common-sense approach to everyday situations, April 29, 2002
      One of the best columns in The New York Times Magazine each week is "The Ethicist" by Randy Cohen. It's sharp, incisive, and provides food for thought. Cohen's book is an expansion on his column, and in a fun twist, he provides an opportunity for his readers to get into the act. One of the strongest points of Cohen's column, and his book, is that he doesn't render his opinion and slam the door shut; he opens the door for further discussion and argument. Cohen admits he doesn't have all the answers, and he includes some comments from writers who have diverged from his opinions. Basically, Cohen's take on ethics is situational; he doesn't hand down ironclad edicts. Most of the questions he receives from readers fall into the "Do I tell or not" category; e.g., do I tell my neighbor I saw her husband with the sexy blonde in the bar. Cohen's advice is to consider your role in the situation; if you are merely a snoopy neighbor then MYOB; but if you are a cop who has busted hubby in a house of ill repute where he stands a high risk of catching HIV and passing it on to his wife, then the wife has a right to know what risks she has been inadvertently exposed to (and let hubby duck before the boom lowers on him). Cohen isn't out to preach or moralize; his goal is to make his readers think, and in this he succeeds admirably. The book is both fun and a learning experience for anyone who reads it.
      Comment Comment | Permalink | Was this review helpful to you?



       
      17 of 23 people found the following review helpful:
      4.0 out of 5 stars Informative, Makes you think and funny as well, December 30, 2002
      By S. Smith "S. Smith" (Dayton, Ohio, USA) - See all my reviews
      (REAL NAME)   
      Well-written, at times humorous and making you think, and sometimes think hard, this book is filled with many of Randy Cohen's letters previously printed in his New York Times Magazine column (as well as other newspapers). Divided into categories are many letters which on occasion appall but always hold our interest as we read the answers Mr. Cohen has written. There is much fodder for discussion here as of course the reader will not always agree with the author. This book makes a good basis upon which to discover how your friends and relations feel about many ethical issues. After finishing the book yesterday I am still thinking about several of my own answers and believe the book to have had a more profound effect than I expected.
      Comment Comment | Permalink | Was this review helpful to you?



       
      12 of 16 people found the following review helpful:
      5.0 out of 5 stars Provocative look at how to be good in the real world, June 2, 2002
      Read THE GOOD, THE BAD & THE DIFFERENCE by
      Randy Cohen, author of THE NEW YORK TIMES MAGAZINE'S
      popular column "The Ethicist" . . . it is a provocative look
      at today's manners and mores with interesting advice
      about how to be good in the real world.

      Though I did not agree with everything that the author wrote,
      it got me thinking . . . it also pointed out to me that
      there are certainly no easy answers to a whole bunch of
      complex questions.

      Cohen has an engaging, breezy style that certainly did not make
      this a dry philosophical tome . . . in particular, his humor added to my enjoyment of the book.

      There were many memorable passages; among them:
      [on whether to tell a boss if you're pregnant when looking for a job]
      But inconvenient as it may be for the boss, pregnancy is a
      fundamental experience that society must accommodate, rather
      than ask individuals to cobble together their own solution. On the other hand, if you'd like to make your every human need
      subservient to the demands of commerce, you might try this
      strategy: Pledge to deliver your baby in the employee lounge
      during your break, making a little cradle out of an empty box
      of file folders. That'll show you're a team player.

      [on when to break up with a girlfriend whose father is severely ill]
      Those in a hurry to break up often seek justification from another Academy Award winner, William Shakespeare: "If it were done, when 'tis done, then "twere well it were done quickly," but the line was spoken by Macbeth; Shakespeare did not intend it
      as a dating tip. As you know, MacBeth's breakup with Duncan
      did not go well.

      [on buying cheap seats and sneaking down to expensive ones]
      It is unfortunate that your dad's seat changing embarrasses you.
      But when you are 11, nearly everything your parents do is
      embarrassing. So as long as you're being mortified, you might as
      well endure it in good seats.

      I only regret that Cohen's column is not carried in my local
      paper.

      Comment Comment | Permalink | Was this review helpful to you?


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      Most Recent Customer Reviews

      1.0 out of 5 stars Disappointingly Filled with Unethical Advice
      This disappointing book that is made up of New York Times ethics columns shows that the guy who writes it is not very ethical himself. Read more
      Published 11 months ago by Mediaman

      2.0 out of 5 stars not what I was hoping for
      This is not what I was hoping for at all, I thought it would give more pointers to people on what is and is not appropriate to say or do in the workplace. Read more
      Published 12 months ago by L. E. Thompson

      2.0 out of 5 stars Stick with NPR
      I bought this book after hearing Randy Cohen on NPR. In extremely small doses, he is sometimes amusing as he addresses topics that made me think. Read more
      Published on May 16, 2005 by D. Brinson

      4.0 out of 5 stars Thought provoking
      As expected, a book expounding one man's "solution" to ethical dilemmas would elicit a wide range of opinions. I agree somewhat with some of Mr. Read more
      Published on February 14, 2005 by Earl K. Takasaki

      1.0 out of 5 stars he should practice what he preaches
      This author used a recent television appearance to promote this book as a chance to share his political views. How "ethical" is that?
      Published on April 7, 2004

      1.0 out of 5 stars Cohen Knows Less About Ethics ...
      Cohen should read a dictionary before writing about ethics. Self-promoting, and as is with most New York Times journalists, knowledge of subject matter and/or credentials for... Read more
      Published on April 7, 2004

      1.0 out of 5 stars New York Times & Ethicist ... Now THAT'S an OXYMORON!
      Not worth the time to read. You'd be better off using the pages from Cohen's book as wallpaper in your daughter's dollhouse. Read more
      Published on April 7, 2004 by Kant Ben Dover

      1.0 out of 5 stars Dangerous, questionable, smarmy; worse than useless
      First, every well-educated person's library should have at least one good ethics book. Second, this book ain't it. Read more
      Published on May 13, 2003

      1.0 out of 5 stars The irony of the hypocritical ethicist
      Everyone has their own opinons about "right from wrong" and Randy Cohen has written a book about his. Read more
      Published on May 4, 2003 by submachine

      4.0 out of 5 stars An entertaining and sometimes enlightening look at ethics
      This book is basically a collection of excerpt from Mr. Cohen's New York times ethics columns. The book is organized into various ethical situations from workplace situations to... Read more
      Published on March 12, 2003

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