Universe Made of Words Says Science

It has emerged today that the Universe is made entirely from words and that all previous scientific theories of space and time are now redundant.

In response to this news, people across the world have been burning the now defunct books of old. One man died hours ago when a burning copy of Newton's Philosophiæ Naturalis Principia Mathematica, disobeying the now redundant laws of gravity, flew upward from a fire and lodged itself in his Adams apple.

This scientific revolution has meant that the nearest the human-race has come to developing a unified theory of everything is in the latest edition of the Oxford English Dictionary which, it is now realised, maps the universe in its entirety.

Because the Universe is made entirely from words, and so is Scunt, it is postulated that the two of us can now mate, thus creating a bastardised hybrid UniScunt which is all-knowing, all-seeing, all-powerful.

We can't guarantee that our reality will be better than the current one, only that it will be more beneficial to us and therefore you, by default.

Here's ushering in a new age.